It seems I’ve always been an outside-the-box kind of thinker. My parents can’t be blamed for this; they didn’t try to raise a maverick. It just seems to be in my DNA to look at thinks a little differently than most people. I feel compelled to analyze things from a different perspective if I just can’t wrap my brain around the conventional mindset.
This trait first appeared in my teens. I was raised in a devout Lutheran home but wanted something more. I couldn’t explain it but eventually ended up in a Pentecostal church. In 1984, when our oldest son was about to embark in the adventure of kindergarten, I began to hear about homeschooling and started researching it. This was when it wasn’t even legal in the state where we live. This fall we will be embarking on our 25th year of homeschooling. Then, in 1988, when we had four children–the perfect family, two boys, two girls–I felt a niggling that needed to be investigated. Thus, we ended up giving up birth control and allowing God to “plan” our family–and now we have a houseful!
My track record for independent thinking is pretty strong. It can be very frustrating to always be going in a different direction than most of the culture around me. I can’t help it; I see things differently. I’ve finally come to accept that I am meant to be different. I don’t know why. I get tired of always going against the flow and no one understanding me.
So, once again I am faced with a whole new perspective of thought. Earlier I wrote a blog on the D-Word (discipline) and in it I mentioned I was going to be taking medication for high cholesterol. Boy, was I wrong about being so flippant about that! I began taking simvastatin the end of January. In two or three weeks, my whole body hurt so bad, I could hardly move. Getting up and down from a chair made everything below the waist holler in protest. At night my left hip hurt so bad, every time I rolled over it would wake me up. In addition to the body aches, I was exhausted. I could sleep (which is a relative term since I spent most of the night waking up to my aching hip) for 9-10 hours a night and still be exhausted. And my energy level was zero.
Finally, after seven weeks of torture, I contacted the doctor because he had mentioned muscle pain could be a side effect of this medication. I had a blood test done which showed reduced cholesterol levels and no indication that there was anything wrong with my muscles. Apparently there would be some elevated level if the muscle tissue was breaking down! He told me to go off the medication for a month, then go back on at a reduced level and see if things were better.
I was only off the medication for a few days and my energy level dramatically increased and the fatigue eased. It didn’t take me long to determine I was not going to go back on that statin! Unfortunately, the pain in my hip has not completely dissipated. I have been off the medication for over two months now and the pain in my hip comes and goes. Some days I don’t notice it at all and other days it’s very annoying.
So, out comes my usual method of operation, and I began to research statin drugs and the whole cholesterol/heart disease thing. I was totally shocked at what I found. Statin drugs can actually cause muscle deterioration to the point of death! It’s rare, of course, but muscle damage is much more common. It occurs on a cellular level because the statin inhibits the development of cholesterol by preventing biochemical processes (which I don’t even pretend to understand because I’m NOT a scientist). These processes end up causing mutations in the mitochondria in the muscle cells which result in damage. Damage which could be permanent.
After only a few weeks of statin use, muscle damage can be permanent! That means the pain in my hip could be around for the rest of my life! I can’t tell you how devastating that is to me. I can deal with aches and pains from aging, but to have to face the rest of my life with pain that is a result of medication is absolutely maddening!
Statin use can also cause memory loss. Duane Graveline has a website devoted to statin-use problems. He is a former astronaut and family physician who experienced first-hand serious memory problems while on lipitor. He is in the forefront of physicians and scientists raising the alarm about statins. There are more of them. A website for cholesterol skeptics at www.thincs.org is for medical professionals and other scientists who have been studying this issue.
I have recently read (well, tried to read) two books about cholesterol and heart disease. They are pretty scientific and I don’t always understand the terminology, but I gleaned enough to know that for all the hoopla about cholesterol and heart disease, it appears high cholesterol doesn’t cause heart disease. In fact, low cholesterol can cause all sorts of problems. Memory loss is one because cholesterol is an important component in brain function.
The use of statins can actually cause heart attacks because of the effect on muscle tissue! There are some respected scientists who believe elevated cholesterol is a sign your body is trying to heal damage to your arteries. There is agreement that damaged arteries that are then covered over by plaque “scabs” cause the problem, but how they get damaged is another matter entirely. Guess what? Arteries are not damaged by cholesterol!
It’s a very complicated matter. I recommend you do some research of your own, especially if “high” cholesterol is an issue for you or someone in your family. I think you’ll be surprised. You will have to wade through layers of the usual low-cholesterol-low-fat stuff to get to what I believe is truth.
Hmmm…maybe that’s what I am. A truth seeker. That sounds much nicer than a maverick, independent-thinking rebel.
I understand the frustration you feel! It’s hard to be going the opposite direction of “culture”! However, when I look around me and the differences between me and (seemingly) “everyone else”, I remember one of my favorite quotes.
“Why are you trying so hard to fit in when you were created to stand out?”
And it reminds me that I am NOT at home here. I’m NOT a citizen of this culture. I’m a citizen of Heaven. A daughter of the King. And yes, I think differently than many and act differently than many and even some who are in my own FAMILY don’t understand me (or seem to want to!). But it’s ok because the only one I want or need to please is my Father. And that’s all that matters.
Thanks for sharing your words of wisdom. You’re a blessing!